March 21, 2005 - Vol. 16, No. 25
News That Concerns Kiwanians and Their Families
Attendance
21
Invocation
Roger Landry
Senior Members
Peter Karagianis, Ed Merski
Honorary Member
Dick Breton
Past Pres. Larry Murphy can't believe that Hon. Member Dick Breton is willing to swear to tell the truth.
Photo by W.S. Loughlin
Thanx
Pres. Paul Cotton reports that we received a thank-you note from
Camp Spaulding for our $1650 donation to allow three youths to
attend. We have also been invited to visit this summer--they
actually have a Kiwanis Day at some point.
Win a Classic!
Pres. Paul Cotton noted the participation of Warren Mitchell,
Michael Bastraw, and himself at the Winnipesaukee Expo last weekend.
Our next roadshow will be in Portland, April 16/17. Past Pres.
Nancy Williams also turned over ticket money from sales at Meredith
Village Savings Bank.
Ha-Ha Funny
Pres. Paul Cotton still has two donated tickets to the Comedy
Night band fundraiser, Laconia High School Auditorium, March
25, 7p-9p (doors open at 6:30p). The show will feature three
Boston-area comedians.
Aloha, Kiwanis
Pres. Paul Cotton reminded everyone that the International Convention
will be in Hawaii this year, July 2-5. Anyone interested in attending
may expect financial assistance from the club.
Let's Get a Lt. Gov.
Pres. Paul Cotton advises that the Division Caucus will be on
Saturday, April 9, 1p, in Portsmouth. The main order of business
will be election of a new Lt. Gov. This is also a possible interclub
opportunity.
Education Fair
Past Pres. Joe Adrignola advised that he plans to have a Kiwanis
table at the Education Fair, Memorial Middle School, March 24,
6:30p-8p. Anyone is welcome to join him. Pres. Paul Cotton will
attend.
We're Invited
Past Pres. Joe Adrignola has received an invitation from Community
Health & Hospice to attend their next Young Family meeting,
Monday, March 28, 12n-1:30p. Pres. Paul Cotton will attend.
RIF
Chair Joe Adrignola, Larry Murphy, Kathy Calvin, Randy Brough,
Bob Champlin, and Marie Ross were on hand at last Wednesday's
Reading Is FUNdamental at Woodland Heights School.
We get some front page action.
Scanned by W.S. Loughlin
Interestingly, the hat is a regular part of Past Pres. Joe Adrignola's wardrobe.
Scanned by W.S. Loughlin
Matters Wolfeboro
Hon. Member Dick Breton reports that the Southern Carroll County
club will be sponsoring a membership buffet, Mt. Whittier, March
30, 6p, featuring Ray Burton, N.H. Governor's Council, as speaker.
Anyone interested in attending should contact him at 524-1225
(h).
Passings
Immediate Past Pres. reported that 22 members attended the service
for Sr. Member Bob Turner Saturday last at the Congregational
Church. Click here
for his obituary.
Amen
Scanned by W.S. Loughlin
50/50
Jim Fortier/Joe Adrignola, $14
Past Presidents Joe Adrignola and Jim Fortier a) take the money, b) cash-in again, or c) share their ill-gotten goods as it's unthinable that anyone else in the club should ever win again....ever.
Photo by W.S. Loughlin
Fines
Sgt.-at-Arms Roger Landry found Joe Collie pinless.
Happy Dollars
Jim Fortier and Joe Adrignola had $2 for winning the 50/50; Warren
Mitchell for Jeff Stone getting a Stafford Oil red pull-on; Roger
Landry for something else; and Anne Huff had $2 for being invited
to speak.
Jeff Stone's new shirt which allowed him to sit next to Past Pres. Nancy Williams.
Photo by W.S. Loughlin
Hello, Leo
Hon. Member Dick Breton reports that he has been in contact with
Past Pres. Leo Sasseville who is doing OK other than having a
new relative in the household. (He also missed Charlie St. Clair
twice in Florida. Jennifer Anderson was there but Charlie had
yet to show.)
Guest Speaker
This writer introduced Lakes Facilitator Anne Huff, N.H. Connections,
(and a former Concord Kiwanian) to the club. This organization
is a statewide initiative, funded by the Department of Education.
The mission is to work with families, schools, and community
members to improve student achievement, while meeting the unique
needs of students with disabilities. Each of the five regions
has a network of 15-20 individuals who meet monthly and create
action plans to address established goals. Members consist of
parents, educators, administrators, service providers, community
members, and elected officials. Maneuvering Through the Maze
is their resource guide to help families obtain access to the
supports and services that would be helpful to them in the care
of their children with special needs. Also on hand was Lakes
Region members Marie Perkins and our own Sec.'y Kathy Calvin.
For further information contact Anne Huff at 848-4251 or go to
parentinformationcenter.org.
Lakes Member Marie Perkins, Lakes Facilitator Anne Huff, N.H. Connections, and Pres. Paul Cotton
Photo by W.S. Loughlin
How Do These People Survive?
Submitted by Sr.
Member Ed Chertok by way of Maxine Derby
ONE Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that
you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked
for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have a half dozen nuggets,"
said the teenager at the counter. "You don't?" I replied.
"We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply.
"So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order
six?" "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered
six McNuggets.
TWO I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few
items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close
to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that they
keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so
they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my
items, she picked up the "divider", looking it all
over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar
code she said ! to me, "Do you know how much this is?"
I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll
buy that today." She said "OK," and I paid her
for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.
THREE A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her
floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired
as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet
and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using
the ATM "thingy."
FOUR I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her
car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied,
"I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote
door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they
(pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery
to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm,
too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy,"
she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the
key and manually unlocked the do! or, I replied, "Why don't
you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long
walk."
FIVE Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift.
One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm
almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use
copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that,
the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put
it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank"
copies.
SIX I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor
home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was
in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like
an extra in "Twister." I asked the manager what had
happened. He told me that the driver had set the "cruise
control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.
SEVEN My neighbor works in the operations department in the central
office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when
they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call
from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question:
"I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do
you guys have a fire downtown?"
EIGHT Police in Radnor, Pa., interrogated a suspect by placing
a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to
a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed
in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they
thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie
detector" was working, the suspect confessed.
NINE A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if
she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was
eating ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl
and should be fine, the mother says, I just gave him some ant
killer..... Dispatcher: Rush him in to emergency!
"Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid."
Monday, April 25
Sheriff Dan Collis will speak on his recent trip to Japan.
Monday, April 18
Open
Monday, April 11
Dr. Jack Polidoro will speak.
Monday, April 4
Boards meet; NISE
Monday, March 28
Bob Selig, Laconia Public Library, will be the guest speaker.
Michael
Bastraw
Editor
Kiwanis Kronikle is a weekly publication of the Kiwanis Club of Laconia, N.H., P.O. Box 757, Laconia, N.H. 03247-0757. We meet Mondays at 6:15 p.m. at the Pheasant Ridge Country Club, Country Club Rd., Gilford, N.H. Please call your President or Secretary about any Member or family member in case of illness. Email: Michael Bastraw or Steve Loughlin
In Memory of Max Chertok, Charter Member - Normandin, Cheney, & O'Neil - Byse Agency - Baron's Major Brands - Wilkinson-Beane Funeral Home - Decorative Interiors - Laconia Savings Bank - Meredith Village Savings Bank - Martin, Lord & Osman, P.A. - The Village Bank - Hart's Turkey Farm Restaurant - Quik Laundry & Cleaners - Stafford Oil Company, Inc. - The Home Beautiful - Cantin Chevrolet/Mitsubishi Contact Webmaster at Mac'N Mike